Posts
Something that's been eating me alive, in the best way, is "Who Killed Amanda Palmer."
If you're unfamiliar with the band The Dresden Dolls, then you are probably very unfamiliar with Amanda Palmer. She's 50% of the group. She put out a solo album last year, and it was produced and worked on with Ben Folds. The thing blows my mind and there's not a day that goes by I don't listen to most if not all of it. So I'm sharing some of the awesome videos she's made. If you want to see all of them, just go here and click the videos link.
Below are some of my very favorites. This album and a book (nothing to do with Amanda Palmer, though she does have an awesome looking photo book coming out soon) have inspired me to start an online video review of things I think will save the world. The book will be the first review I do, so look for that to come in this space shortly. If you're looking for things here at all. In the meantime, enjoy Amanda Palmer.
Peace and Love.
Tuesday, April 21, 2009
Thursday, December 18, 2008
Thursday, December 4, 2008
Car Crash
I was speaking to a friend recently about my writing, and she asked me if I had published anything. The question seemed ridiculous at first, cause what do I have to publish? Then when I thought about it I realized I have quite a bit of material I've written over the years, I just don't share it very often. So what the hell, here's a ditty I put together earlier this year. I quite like it, and it reflected an emotional state I was in at the time. Enjoy.
Car Crash
I am a car crash.
I am not quiet or subtle.
I will not relieve you of any burden.
You will not avoid this.
I am coming for you.
I have not thought this through, and no planning on your part can stop me.
You are not a defensive driver.
Break, gas, break, and I am still there.
Swerve left then right and I will find you.
I am nudging your rear bumper just to peak your curiosity.
I am scraping at your passenger door as though asking to be let in.
As though you could stop me.
As though you had a choice.
How far can tempered glass bend before it creaks, and cracks and chips, and shatters?
Before a million tiny pieces sail through you, cutting, shredding, filling you with sand from a thousand beaches and deserts you will never visit?
I am coming for you.
And you will not thank me later.
When you survive this, and it makes you stronger, or faster, or more hopeful, and years from now when you find your true calling, or wealth, or God, or Love, you will not look back on me with appreciation.
You will not pay me respect.
And it will not matter, because right now I am coming for you.
Breaking through your metal and glass, and plastic and electronics and supelly wood accents, pop up nav screens, DVD’s for the kids, ipod docks, flesh, bone, blood, soul.
I do not find your pain attractive.
I do not want to fuck your wounds.
I am not James Spader.
This is not a romantic endeavor or a Dave Matthews song.
I am coming for you.
I have taken your defenses already.
You think you are protected from me, but you are not.
Your seat belt has been cut, your airbag is deflated, even NASCAR quality crash webbing would only sear and burn you.
You are mine, and you are blissfully unaware.
You are listening to your radio while I burn fuel on your hood.
You are watching the scenery go by while I crush your roof in.
I am sitting in the passenger seat with your heart in my hand, and you are ignorant of the gaping bleeding hole in your chest.
I would pity you if you hadn’t asked me to come in the first place, and make no mistake, I am coming for you.
Your tears do not amuse me.
Your blood does not keep me warm.
Your mangled body is no comfort.
I need you to understand.
I am coming for you.
So pay attention.
Turn off the music and drive.
Petal to the floor and straight as an arrow.
Come for me.
Show me no quarter.
Take me with as much force as you can muster because I will do the same to you.
And if you’re lucky, or wise, or faster or better… which I doubt, then maybe as the blood runs down your face and the sirens wail in the distance and the world goes dark and fuzzy at the edges, just before you slip out of the waking world and into the nightmare I have given you as my only lasting gift, maybe the last sound you hear will be a scream as unfamiliar as justice.
Maybe the death caused this time will not be yours, and you’ll have the satisfaction of knowing before the sun sets on this disaster that you were the one who could have truly loved me.
But I doubt it.
I am coming for you.
Tuesday, November 25, 2008
Woke Up New
I'm counting down the hours now. Life is about to change, in some way, very soon.
A couple cool things have happened recently. I saw Tolkien and C.S. Lewis' writing desks, along with Lewis' Wardrobe, on a trip to Wheaton, IL for the purpose of picking up a meaningful few pages in booklet form. That was unexpected, and a wonderful day.
I've been watching a lot of House recently. A great show in my humble opinion. And one that I can sit down and watch as many episodes as USA wants to throw my way in an evening. Love it. Recently a quote from that show struck me as very appropriate to me now. "Either you've learned everything you can here, or you haven't learned anything. Either way it's time for a change."
My musical tastes are usually all over the map, but here's a great ditty that I'm re-loving right now.
Wish me luck in the next few days. Updates when there's something to tell.
Always,
B
A couple cool things have happened recently. I saw Tolkien and C.S. Lewis' writing desks, along with Lewis' Wardrobe, on a trip to Wheaton, IL for the purpose of picking up a meaningful few pages in booklet form. That was unexpected, and a wonderful day.
I've been watching a lot of House recently. A great show in my humble opinion. And one that I can sit down and watch as many episodes as USA wants to throw my way in an evening. Love it. Recently a quote from that show struck me as very appropriate to me now. "Either you've learned everything you can here, or you haven't learned anything. Either way it's time for a change."
My musical tastes are usually all over the map, but here's a great ditty that I'm re-loving right now.
Wish me luck in the next few days. Updates when there's something to tell.
Always,
B
Friday, November 7, 2008
He was Edmond Dantes...
In case you don't know, some shit went down this week.
Living in Chicago for many years now, I am rapturous at the idea that a Senator I helped vote into office, has now been elected President of the United States. Moreover, this is the first politician I have ever truly believed in. Which is not to say that there haven't been good men and women that I have been happy to support before. However, I remember Obama announcing his candidacy from the steps of the State Capitol where Lincoln did the same thing over one hundred forty years ago. The tone of that speech set the tone for his campaign, and I remember listening to it, then calling my mother and telling her that for the first time in my short Presidential voting record, I would be voting for a candidate instead of against one. I bought my Obama T-shirt that day too. There would be many democratic contenders, and a brutal primary season that would follow, but I was never truly afraid of failure because I had seen the man in action. At a rally for a south Chicago hospital that Obama had fought for insurance and fair wages for the employees as a lawyer and organizer, I saw the man in person, and was moved by his compassion for his roots, even in the midst of his ascendancy.
Yes he is well spoken and intelligent, but it's his ability to connect with people on their own ground that makes you proud to tell people about him, and believe that he can be an agent of change. I once heard a man speak about his christian outreach attempt at the Chicago Pride Parade. A group of Christians was handing out free bottles of water, and doing very little preaching in the process. A large man in a speedo and nothing else with the body of a professional wrestler or body builder asked why they were handing out the water for free. He demanded to know what the catch was. When he told the speedo man that they were Christians, but that they were just there to give out cold water on a hot day, the man became hostile. He said that god didn't love him, and that he wasn't about to come to church and pray. He barely heard the much smaller man trying to tell him that he just wanted to give him some water if he wanted it. Not preach, not judge, not condemn. What was said next has stuck with me since. The water man said "God loves you, period. And he's willing to meet you wherever you are. Would you like this water?"
I'm not trying to say that Obama = God, cause that's not fair, or true, or even an intelligent thing to think. I'm saying that what appeals to me about the openness, and compassion that my God displays is the same openness and compassion that I saw in my candidate for President. A lot of things in this world are powerful, but what I think this election proves most of all is that hope is a trump card. Fear, anger, hate, sadness, oppression, depression, all of these are powerful tools and weapons, but they are made for battling each other. They are nothing against hope.
I had a transformative experience on the fifth of November. Guy Fawkes Night is one of my favorite holidays because of what it reminds me of. Specifically it calls on us to remember a bit of history, and what can happen when one people are pushed to far, or oppressed too much by a seemingly more powerful group. Change. Though the Gunpowder Plot failed, it set the stage for eventual reform. Eventually the oppressed people were not so oppressed any more. Eventually things get better. Once the shock of what happens wears off, people look around and ask why. I feel that a good comparison for this nontraditional holiday is actually very close to Americans without them realizing it. September 11, 2001.
Let's examine the similarities, because the only real difference is that almost 400 years later, the plot was successful. Both catholic extremists, and Muslim extremists felt oppressed by a larger controlling group. They'd both been killed for years in the name of other people's wars. They both sought change by shocking and hurting what they viewed as the source of their trouble. And similar to the reform that eventually took place in Protestant England, real reform is on it's way in the United States. We finally have a chance to prove to the world that we can be a source for responsible leadership in the world. We can stop going to war and inciting more terrorists over our search for oil. We can at long last remember our mistakes as a way of affecting change on the future.
This year I built a small bonfire in my backyard and made a few effigies to toss into it. I feel cleaner now. More ready. More willing. Mostly able. I see the future, and I'm happy, and I'm hopeful.
Living in Chicago for many years now, I am rapturous at the idea that a Senator I helped vote into office, has now been elected President of the United States. Moreover, this is the first politician I have ever truly believed in. Which is not to say that there haven't been good men and women that I have been happy to support before. However, I remember Obama announcing his candidacy from the steps of the State Capitol where Lincoln did the same thing over one hundred forty years ago. The tone of that speech set the tone for his campaign, and I remember listening to it, then calling my mother and telling her that for the first time in my short Presidential voting record, I would be voting for a candidate instead of against one. I bought my Obama T-shirt that day too. There would be many democratic contenders, and a brutal primary season that would follow, but I was never truly afraid of failure because I had seen the man in action. At a rally for a south Chicago hospital that Obama had fought for insurance and fair wages for the employees as a lawyer and organizer, I saw the man in person, and was moved by his compassion for his roots, even in the midst of his ascendancy.
Yes he is well spoken and intelligent, but it's his ability to connect with people on their own ground that makes you proud to tell people about him, and believe that he can be an agent of change. I once heard a man speak about his christian outreach attempt at the Chicago Pride Parade. A group of Christians was handing out free bottles of water, and doing very little preaching in the process. A large man in a speedo and nothing else with the body of a professional wrestler or body builder asked why they were handing out the water for free. He demanded to know what the catch was. When he told the speedo man that they were Christians, but that they were just there to give out cold water on a hot day, the man became hostile. He said that god didn't love him, and that he wasn't about to come to church and pray. He barely heard the much smaller man trying to tell him that he just wanted to give him some water if he wanted it. Not preach, not judge, not condemn. What was said next has stuck with me since. The water man said "God loves you, period. And he's willing to meet you wherever you are. Would you like this water?"
I'm not trying to say that Obama = God, cause that's not fair, or true, or even an intelligent thing to think. I'm saying that what appeals to me about the openness, and compassion that my God displays is the same openness and compassion that I saw in my candidate for President. A lot of things in this world are powerful, but what I think this election proves most of all is that hope is a trump card. Fear, anger, hate, sadness, oppression, depression, all of these are powerful tools and weapons, but they are made for battling each other. They are nothing against hope.
I had a transformative experience on the fifth of November. Guy Fawkes Night is one of my favorite holidays because of what it reminds me of. Specifically it calls on us to remember a bit of history, and what can happen when one people are pushed to far, or oppressed too much by a seemingly more powerful group. Change. Though the Gunpowder Plot failed, it set the stage for eventual reform. Eventually the oppressed people were not so oppressed any more. Eventually things get better. Once the shock of what happens wears off, people look around and ask why. I feel that a good comparison for this nontraditional holiday is actually very close to Americans without them realizing it. September 11, 2001.
Let's examine the similarities, because the only real difference is that almost 400 years later, the plot was successful. Both catholic extremists, and Muslim extremists felt oppressed by a larger controlling group. They'd both been killed for years in the name of other people's wars. They both sought change by shocking and hurting what they viewed as the source of their trouble. And similar to the reform that eventually took place in Protestant England, real reform is on it's way in the United States. We finally have a chance to prove to the world that we can be a source for responsible leadership in the world. We can stop going to war and inciting more terrorists over our search for oil. We can at long last remember our mistakes as a way of affecting change on the future.
This year I built a small bonfire in my backyard and made a few effigies to toss into it. I feel cleaner now. More ready. More willing. Mostly able. I see the future, and I'm happy, and I'm hopeful.
Friday, October 31, 2008
Halloween Update
It's now the end of October. I'm reminded of a line from the Avett Brother's song Salina "I'm changing the plans that I've been setting on. I'm scared by the way that my life's getting gone." Tomorrow is November 1st and what have I done in the past few months of note? I've started going to a church that I enjoy for the first time in many years. It's really affected my outlook on things. I found that I walk with my head up more and admire the rooftops instead of the gutters. This made for some wonderfully enjoyable fall days that I feel confident I would have missed out on fully by looking down. Fall has a lot to do with the feeling like things are moving too quickly without enough being accomplished. Fall is only about one month at best here, and that means the color goes about as quickly as the temperature changes. That's hard on a country boy who as of late has been missing the peace of the country a great deal.
I find that when I ask for answers, I mostly get more questions. The main answer I've been looking for recently still eludes me like a Clash song. But for all the signs that pointed to going at the beginning, there have been as many things recently that suggest I would be prosperous should I stay. I'm on the boards of 3 organizations I care deeply for now, which all happened in the last month or so. Work is the same, but I feel more respected, and accepted in the circles I've been trying to be a part of. I feel like I'm on the edge of things starting to pay off professionally, if not personally. There's just an ominous tone to everything now. I mean remember what happened to the boy who suddenly got everything he ever wanted. But what Wonka never mentions is the life you have to give up to live the life you dream. Mark touches on it though, and these days I'm more inclined to heed a disciple than a candy man.
I feel like I'm waiting for the final argument to come. I feel like that's coming in November. I'm scared of what it may mean. Once all the debating is done, it will be time for action, and that means sacrifice one way or the other. Like the song says though "One day I'll - some day I'll come home." Oh, what a day that will be.
More details later....
I find that when I ask for answers, I mostly get more questions. The main answer I've been looking for recently still eludes me like a Clash song. But for all the signs that pointed to going at the beginning, there have been as many things recently that suggest I would be prosperous should I stay. I'm on the boards of 3 organizations I care deeply for now, which all happened in the last month or so. Work is the same, but I feel more respected, and accepted in the circles I've been trying to be a part of. I feel like I'm on the edge of things starting to pay off professionally, if not personally. There's just an ominous tone to everything now. I mean remember what happened to the boy who suddenly got everything he ever wanted. But what Wonka never mentions is the life you have to give up to live the life you dream. Mark touches on it though, and these days I'm more inclined to heed a disciple than a candy man.
I feel like I'm waiting for the final argument to come. I feel like that's coming in November. I'm scared of what it may mean. Once all the debating is done, it will be time for action, and that means sacrifice one way or the other. Like the song says though "One day I'll - some day I'll come home." Oh, what a day that will be.
More details later....
Wednesday, October 8, 2008
It's only 84 days away!!
It's October 8th, and when I woke up this morning, I knew I'd be thinking ahead all day long....
When the bells all ring, and the horns all blow, and the couples we know are fondly kissing.
Will I be with you or will I be among the missing?
Maybe it's much to early in the game.
Aw, but I thought I'd ask you just the same.
What are you doing New Year's? New Year's Eve?
Wonder whose arms will hold you good and tight,
when it's exactly twelve o'clock that night,
welcoming in the New Year. New Year's Eve.
Maybe I'm crazy to suppose
I'd ever be the one you chose
out of the thousand invitations you receive.
Oh, but in case I stand one little chance,
here comes the jackpot question in advance:
What are you doing New Year's? New Year's Eve?
When the bells all ring, and the horns all blow, and the couples we know are fondly kissing.
Will I be with you or will I be among the missing?
Maybe it's much to early in the game.
Aw, but I thought I'd ask you just the same.
What are you doing New Year's? New Year's Eve?
Wonder whose arms will hold you good and tight,
when it's exactly twelve o'clock that night,
welcoming in the New Year. New Year's Eve.
Maybe I'm crazy to suppose
I'd ever be the one you chose
out of the thousand invitations you receive.
Oh, but in case I stand one little chance,
here comes the jackpot question in advance:
What are you doing New Year's? New Year's Eve?
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